We are… or at least were, a normal couple, Angie and Freddie, both in our mid 50’s and living in Peterborough for most of our lives. We met later in life, about 11 years ago and both had children from other relationships. Freddie was in I.T. and Angie had been in retail. After meeting online we became a regular blended family. Nothing unusual, just a local family going about their lives. One daughter was getting married, another doing A levels and getting ready for Uni, and Dan had a good job, a nice car and was an avid Gym visitor and had until recently been engaged.
As a family we thought things were going well, life was just going about its everyday challenges. Two of our parents had passed away fairly recently and the other two were becoming frail and increasingly in and out of the hospital, another passed away in 2017 and the remaining one was now in a care home with Dementia.
Just normal, not always easy and with our share of stresses and worries like everyone else. So when the unimaginable happens you can’t really believe it. I don’t mean the actual day or even the first few weeks as they are just a blur of pain, emotion and paperwork, phone calls and organisation.
The next 4 years were madness, changing jobs, funerals, another death in the family, a global pandemic, and all whilst trying to deal with this gaping hole that can bring you to your knees at a moment’s notice.
As I write this we are approaching the 4th anniversary of Dan’s death, and whilst there are still awful times, and support groups, along with online forums and charity events etc we are aware that a lot of what we have been through was with very little support or even any real idea of what was ” the new normal” so we started Life After Dan.
Originally a Facebook page at Life After Dan | Facebook was started 6 months after we lost Dan, so that had a way of just saying things out loud, we realised though that we have unfortunately learned quite a lot and may be able to help others that are going through the same things we are.
Life After Dan is both Dan’s Legacy, memorial and also a way to try and make something worthwhile from the most horrendous event. Helping even one person makes it the tiniest bit less painful.